


A cursed group chat

by Im_THAT_bitch



Category: Boruto: Naruto Next Generations
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Chatting & Messaging, Everyone Is Gay, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, How Do I Tag, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Bad At Tagging, LGBTQ Themes, Light Angst, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Texting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-10
Updated: 2019-10-14
Packaged: 2019-11-14 23:53:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18062597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Im_THAT_bitch/pseuds/Im_THAT_bitch
Summary: [Kakei Sumire created the group chat][Group Chat was renamed HS][Kakei Sumire added 10 new members]5:34 PMKakei Sumire: Hi guys!! I'm Sumire, I don't know if you remember but i'm the president of our classKakei Sumire: I thought it would be great if we had a group chat for school-related things!Kakei Sumire: Professor Shino was kind enough to provide me with the numbers of the students he has, I hope none of you mind!OrThe group chat au that we all need.





	1. Sarada is a Bitch

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys!! My God, I haven't written a fic in literally YEARS! my first time in almost 4 years, i'm so nervous bc this is my first time doing something in another language!! I speak spanish so if you see some mistakes please let me know so I can fix it! Also I wrote this on my phone cuz Im poor and a have no computer so, that  
> This is also my first Boruto fic, I didn't read the manga but I loved the anime, I hope you enjoy it!  
> The teen and up audiences is mostly for the swearing

**[ Kakei Sumire ** ** created the group chat] **

** [Group Chat was renamed HS] **

** [Kakei Sumire added 10 new members] **

** 5:34 PM **

**Kakei Sumire:** Hi guys!! I'm Sumire, I don't know if you remember but i'm the president of our class

 **Kakei Sumire:** I thought it would be great if we had a group chat for school-related things!

 **Kakei Sumire:** Professor Shino was kind enough to provide me with the numbers of the students he has, I hope none of you mind!

 **Uchiha Sarada:** it's a great idea, I don't mind at all

 **Suzumeno Namida:** i second that, thank you for adding me!!

 **Nara Shikadai:** it would be troublesome to ask for the homework in person so this is fine 

 **Akimichi Chouchou:** for u breathing is troublesome

 **Nara Shikadai:** your existence is troublesome

 **Yamanaka Inojin:** savage but true

 **Akimichi Chouchou:** god I hate both of u 

 **Kakei Sumire:** I see some of you already know each other, that's nice!!

 **Uchiha Sarada:** Define "nice"

 **Uzumaki Boruto:** i know you're talking about me Uchiha I can sense it

 **Uzumaki Boruto:** hey btw I'm Boruto 

 **Uchiha Sarada:** literally nobody cares

 **Uzumaki Boruto:** wow.

_Uchiha Sarada was renamed UchiBitch._

**UchiBitch:**  seriously?? Is not even good Boruto wtf

 **Uzumaki Boruto:** shut up

 **Kakei Sumire:** Well... Anyways, it would be nice if we introduce ourselves, since we're going to be classmates for the rest of high school, i'll start if you all don't mind!

 **Kakei Sumire:** As already stated, my name is Sumire, i'm 15 years old, I'm a little shy but once I gain a little trust it gets better!!

 **UchiBitch:** Sarada, i'm 15, and I already know like 5 people here

 **Nara Shikadai:** my name is Shikadai, 15, I'm one of the people UchiBitch knows

 **Akimichi Chouchou:** the names Chouchou, im 15 and i am one of the most beautiful things u will ever see

 **Yamanaka Inojin:** youre fat

 **Akimichi Chouchou:** never said I wasnt

 **Yamanaka Inojin:** fair enough

 **Yamanaka Inojin:** im Inojin, 14, I like to draw

 **Suzemeno Namida:** Hi everybody!! I'm Namida, i'm 14, i'm excited to meet all of you!

 **Izuno Wasabi:** god you're so cute and I love u so much

 **Izuno Wasabi:** Wasabi here, im 15 and I love Namida

 **Suzumeno Namida:** Asjjdakksnds WASABI!!!

 **Suzumeno Namida:** i love you too <3

 **Izuno Wasabi:** <3

 **Uzumaki Boruto:** are you two, like, together??

 **Uzumaki Boruto:** no need to answer if you don't feel comfortable tho, im just curious

 **Suzumeno Namida:** Oh no! We're just friends, and don't worry, I would get curious too

 **Izuno Wasabi:** no homo

 **Izuno Wasabi:** but i am, in fact, full homo

 **Uzumaki Boruto:** cool. Wait a sec

_Izuno Wasabi was renamed Full Homo._

**Full Homo:** i love it, bless you

 **Metal Lee:** HI EVERYBODY, MY NAME IS METAL AND ITS NICE TO MEET YOU 

 **Nara Shikadai:** you're the one who almost fainted right?? In the green spandex

 **Metal Lee:** oh my, you all saw it?? 

 **UchiBitch** : you were kinda in the middle of the room so yeah

 **Metal Lee:** im so embarrassed!! I try to control it but I always get nervous when im around new people

 **Kakei Sumire:** Don't worry about it, I think everybody is a little nervous when they start in a new school!

 **Yuino Iwabee:** Hey, My Names Iwabee, Im 16, Im Repeating This Year

 **Uzumaki Boruto:** Why Do You Write Like This

 **Yuino Iwabee:** Bc I Can

 **Nara Shikadai:** dear God

 **Kaminarimon Denki:** Hi there! My name is Denki and i'm 14

 **Uzumaki Boruto:** Kaminarimon?? As the biggest train company there is??

 **Kaminarimon Denki:**  Exactly that one hehe

 **Uzumaki Boruto:** holy shit dude

 **Uzumaki Boruto:** well I guess that leaves me, you already know who i am, im 15 and I like to bother Sarada

 **UchiBitch:** i despise you. 

_UchiBitch was renamed Sarada._

**Sarada:**  Fucking finally

 **Uzumaki Boruto:** you suck the fun out of everything

 **Kakei Sumire:** Okay guys, I think that was everyone!! It's nice to meet all of you and I hope we get to have a wonderful time together!

 **Sarada:** i hope, too

 

 

**9:45 PM**

**[HS was renamed Sarada is a Bitch]**

 

 **Sarada:** this is going to be a horrible year.

 


	2. Enter: the snake boi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a new guy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy your reading!!

**[Sarada is a Bitch]**

 

**AUGUST 5, 3:48 PM**

  
_Uzumaki Boruto was renamed waste of oxygen_

  
**[Sarada is a Bitch was renamed Konoha HS]**

**Full Homo:** oof

 **Sarada** : he deserves it

 **waste of oxygen:** how aggressive

 **waste of oxygen:** whatever guys have you see the new guy

 **Akimichi Chouchou:** ye

 **Akimichi Chouchou:** hes cute but a little weird

_Akimichi Chouchou was renamed thirsty gurl_

**thirsty gurl:** i wont say its not true

 **Nara Shikadai:** he was following Boruto all day

 **Nara Shikadai:** did he talk to you??

 **waste of oxygen:** i mean

 **waste of oxygen:** i said hi when he sat with me and Sarada at lunch, but he just smiled and didn't say anything

 **Sarada:** he had a lunch but didn't even touch it, he just kept staring us

 **Sarada:** it was hella weird

 **Kakei Sumire:** According to the list his name is Mitsuki, he comes from the Sound city

 **Nara Shikadai:** why do you have his information

 **Kakei Sumire:** He's in our class

 **Sarada:** no he isn't

 **waste of oxygen:** no he isnt

 **Nara Shikadai:** no he isn't

 **Nara Shikadai:** i think we would've noticed if we had a new classmate

 **Kakei Sumire:** That's because he wasn't in our class today

 **Kakei Sumire:** He was in 1-C but they transferred him to our class

 **Kakei Sumire:** Apparently he asked for it

 **thirsty gurl:** mmm suspicious

 **Sarada:** it is kinda weird

 **Nara Shikadai:** do you think he did it for boruto??

 **waste of oxygen:** i think you guys watch too much BuzzFeed unsolved

 **waste of oxygen:** and youre giving this more thought than necessary

 **waste of oxygen:** go to sleep

 **Sarada:** its 4:00 in the afternoon

 **waste of oxygen:** and yet Shikadai is already asleep

* * *

 

**AUGUST 11, 10:37 AM**

 

**Boruidiot > Saradumb**

 

 **Boruidiot:** hes staring at me again do something

 **Saradumb:** What do you want me to do??Punch him in the face??

 **Boruidiot:** no!!

 **Boruidiot:** but do something, hes making me nervous

 **Boruidiot:** oh God hes coming my way

 **Saradumb:** stop whining, maybe he wants to ask you something

* * *

 

**AUGUST 11, 3:47 PM**

 

** [Konoha HS] **

 

 **waste of oxygen:** so Mitsuki talked to me today

 **thirsty gurl:** oooh

 **waste of oxygen:** yeah

 **waste of oxygen:** he told me that his parent knows my dad

 **waste of oxygen:** and my dad actually helped him to get in our school

 **waste of oxygen:** and he told mitsuki that since he didn’t know anyone he could talk to me bc apparently I’m very friendly

 **Nara Shikadai:** well, you are

 **Full Homo:** yeah, we just met last week and I feel like we are the bestest of friends

 **Sarada:** I suppose you're really good at socializing

 **waste of oxygen:** aww guys

 **waste of oxygen:** thats gay

 **Sarada:** see why I can’t treat you nicely

 **waste of oxygen:** anyways we talked for a bit and hes actually really nice

 **waste of oxygen:** still really really weird, but nice

 **Kakei Sumire:** That’s so good to hear

 **Kakei Sumire:** I’m going to add him since he’s new, i bet he would like to meet new people!

 **Kakei Sumire:** plus no one else in our class wants to be here :(

 **thirsty gurl:** its their loss, don’t worry about it ;)

 **waste of oxygen:** yeah, plus we already bonded here

 **waste of oxygen:** this is now a friends gc

 **Kakei Sumire:** :)))

 **Kakei Sumire:** Well, i'm going to add him!!

**[Kakei Sumire added a new member]**

**Kakei Sumire:** Hi!! My name is Sumire and i am the president of our class!!

 **Kakei Sumire:** I thought you would like to be in the class gc!!

 **Kakei Sumire:** If you want, you can tell us your age and something about yourself!

 **Mitsuki:** Hi, I am Mitsuki, i’m 15 years old, and I like snakes

 **Nara Shikadai:** sup

 **Sarada:** Hey

 **thirsty gurl:** Hiii, im Chouchou!!

 **waste of oxygen:** yo Mitsuki!!

 **waste of oxygen:** its Boruto btw

 **waste of oxygen:** you can thanks Sarada for the stupid name

 **Sarada:** He deserves it

 **Mitsuki:** Thanks for adding me

 **Kakei Sumire:** You’re welcome!

 **Nara Shikadai:** so

 **Nara Shikadai:** you’re new in the city right??

 **Mitsuki:** Yes, my family had to move from Sound City and my parent thought that Boruto's dad could help us

 **Sarada:** Why did you have to move??

 **Mitsuki:** It’s a personal matter, i'm sorry

 **Sarada:** Don’t apologize, I understand

 **waste of oxygen:** so, i guess you don’t know very well the city

 **waste of oxygen:** we can hang out and I can show around if you’re not busy right now!!

 **Mitsuki:** I would like that

 **waste of oxygen:** sweet

 **waste of oxygen:** anybody else who wants to join??

 **Nara Shikadai:** ill go

 **Nara Shikadai:** Inojin says he wants to go too

 **Sarada:** I already finished my homework so i'll join

 **thirsty gurl:** we can meet at the park

 **thirsty gurl:** the one with the big ass fountain

 **Metal Lee:** IM GOING AS WELL

 **Full Homo:** Namida and I are going

 **Yuino Iwabee:** Im Already Here With Denki

 **waste of oxygen:** you ruin my eyes every time you write

 **waste of oxygen:** well I suppose we’re meeting there, you know which park is Mitsuki??

 **Mitsuki:** If you’re referring to the one two blocks away from the school then yes

 **waste of oxygen:** noice, see yall there

* * *

 

**AUGUST 11, 4:04 PM**

 

**[Sunshine Family]**

 

 **Sunshine Boy:** hey dad

 **Sunshine Boy:** when were you planning on telling me that you told a boy he could be my friend??

 **Sunshine Dad:** What?

 **Sunshine Dad:** Oh, you’re talking about Mitsuki!!

 **Sunshine Dad:** Sorry, I didn’t think it would bother you, did he do something??

 **Sunshine Boy:** no no, actually we’re gonna meet in the park right now, but you should’ve said something sooner, the poor guy just sat and kept staring at me

 **Sunshine Dad:** Well that’s nice, and you’re right, sorry i'm a bit busy and i forget things

 **Sunshine Boy:** don’t worry old man, just come home to family night on Saturday and we’re fine

 **Sunshine Dad:** You got it, son

 **Sunshine Mom:** I heard that Mitsuki is a little bit shy, so try to integrate him sweetie

 **Sunshine Mom:** Maybe one of these days you can bring him home

 **Sunshine Girl:** Yes!! Bring your new friend!!

 **Sunshine Boy:** will do mama, love you guys <3

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Introducing my favorite boy + the sunshine family  
> I thought that a group chat fic would be easy to write  
> I was wrong lol  
> If you see some mistakes please tell me!!  
> I'm still deciding the Actual Plot for this but I already have a few ideas, hopefully it'll be good!!  
> If you liked it don't forget to leave a comment and kudos <3


	3. The Ramen Thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some heart to heart conversations.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy your reading!!

**AUGUST 17, 6:12 AM**

**[Konoha HS]**

 

 **waste of oxygen** : good morning babes

 **Sarada** : What the fuck is wrong with you.

 **waste of oxygen** : absolutely everything

 **Mitsuki** : Good morning

 **Sarada** : WHY ARE YOU TWO AWAKE AT THIS UNGODLY HOUR

 **Sarada** : YOU WOKE ME UP

 **Metal Lee** : I’m awake too

 **Metal Lee** : I’m doing my morning training with my dad

 **Nara Shikadai** : your morning what now

 **Sarada** : boruto answer my question

 **Sarada** : why are you awake

 **waste of oxygen** : my little sister is sick and she feels bad about waking my parents up so she came to me

 **Kakei Sumire** : you have a little sister, how cute!!

 **Kakei Sumire** : how old is she?

 **waste of oxygen** : she’s 12 and shes not cute shes a demon

 **Sarada** : She is cute

 **Sarada** : but she’s also deadly

 **Sarada** : is she okay??

 **waste of oxygen** : yeah don’t worry it’s just a stomach bug

 **waste of oxygen** : what are yall doing awake this early??

 **Nara Shikadai** : I forgot to put my phone on silent last night

 **Nara Shikadai** : now I can’t sleep

 **Mitsuki** : I was feeding my snakes

 **Kakei Sumire** : I couldn’t sleep so i'm cleaning my room

 **waste of oxygen** : wow Sumire

 **waste of oxygen** : youre everything my mom wishes for me to be

* * *

 

**AUGUST 27, 4:12 PM**

**[Uchiha Sarada created the group chat]**

**[Group Chat was renamed Study Group]**

**[Uchiha Sarada added two new members]**

 

 **Uchiha Sarada** : I still can’t believe professor Shino did this to me

 **Uzumaki Boruto** : i hate you

 _Uchiha Sarada was renamed Angry Tomato_  
_Mitsuki was renamed Snek Boi_

 **Uzumaki Boruto** : there we go

 **Angry Tomato** : I’m going to exterminate you.

_Uzumaki Boruto was renamed Lame Ramen_

**Lame Ramen** : YOU KNOW I HATE RAMEN

 **Angry Tomato** : YOU NAMED ME TOMATO

 **Lame Ramen** : BUT YOU LIKE THEM

 **Angry Tomato** : AND DON’T LIE TO ME I SAW YOU EAT RAMEN

 **Lame Ramen** : its not that and you know it

 **Lame Ramen** : its about what it represents

 **Snek Boi** : And what does it represents?

 **Lame Ramen** : It represents my genetics, it represents a tradition and a destiny that has been imposed to me since I was a little and innocent child, and me fighting it represents how i'm not going to be submitted by it, I WRITE MY OWN DESTINY.

 **Angry Tomato** : When he was 12 he hated his dad and to hurt him he used to say that he hated his dad’s favorite dish

 **Angry Tomato** : Ramen

 **Angry Tomato** : And he doesn’t want to let the whole thing go, it’s been three years Boruto

 **Lame Ramen** : MY WHOLE FAMILY LOVES IT WE HAVE A FUCKING DAY DEDICATED TO IT

 **Snek Boi** : But you love it though

 **Angry Tomato** : oh??

 **Snek Boi** : When he fell asleep in class the other day he talked in his sleep and said that he was craving some ramen

 **Angry Tomato** : OHH???

 **Angry Tomato** : SO THE TRUTH COMES OUT AT LAST

 **Lame Ramen** : MITSUKI 

 **Angry Tomato** : I’m so telling this to Uncle Naruto

 **Lame Ramen** : NO DON’T DO IT YOURE GOING TO RUIN MY BAD BOY REPUTATION

 **Angry Tomato** : I-ASDJKLLADKL

 **Angry Tomato** : The only reputation you have is being mommy’s and daddy’s boy

 **Lame Ramen** : SHUT UP

 **Lame Ramen** : MITSUKI YOU ARE THE WORST YOU RUINED MY REPUTATION

 **Snek Boi** : I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to

 **Angry Tomato** : Don’t apologize Mitsuki, you did the right thing

 **Snek Boi** : Did I?

 **Lame Ramen** : NO

* * *

 

  
**[Sunshine Family]**

 

 **Sunshine Dad** : I don’t know if i feel like a fool or if i feel very proud of you

 **Sunshine Mom** : We’re having ramen tonight

 **Sunshine Boy** : OMFGKSKDNDNDN

* * *

 

  
**Mitsuki > Uchiha Sarada**

 

 **Mitsuki** : I have a question

 **Uchiha Sarada** : uh sure, shoot

 **Mitsuki** : Is Boruto really mad at me?

 **Uchiha Sarada** : I don’t think so?? Why would he??

 **Mitsuki** : For ruining his reputation

 **Uchiha Sarada** : what do you mean

 **Uchiha Sarada** : Ohh, you’re talking about the ramen thing

 **Uchiha Sarada** : Of course he’s not angry, don’t worry it’s just a joke, don’t take everything we say seriously

 **Uchiha Sarada** : obviously we don’t hate each other, I actually love him very much, he’s like a brother, part of my family

 **Mitsuki** : Oh

 **Mitsuki** : That’s nice

 **Mitsuki** : Thank you Sarada

 **Uchiha Sarada** : You’re welcome!!

* * *

 

  
**Saradumb > Boruidiot**

 

 **Saradumb** : hey, can you talk to Mitsuki?? He thinks you’re mad at him

 **Boruidiot** : ???

 **Boruidiot** : why would he think that??

 **Saradumb** : He thinks you’re mad for the ramen thing

 **Saradumb** : I told him it was just a joke but it would be good if you reassured him

 **Boruidiot** : oh

 **Boruidiot** : don’t worry I’ll talk to him

 **Saradumb** : good

* * *

 

  
**Boruto > Mitsuki**

 

 **Boruto** : Hey Mitsuki

 **Boruto** : Sarada told me you’re worried about me being mad at you

 **Boruto** : I want you to know that it was just a joke and you’re an amazing friend

 **Boruto** : that’s just how our humor is

 **Mitsuki** : Don’t worry, Sarada explained it to me, she said that that’s how you treat each other but you actually love her as much as she loves you

 **Boruto** : SHE SAID THAT?? OMG WHEN WE FINISH WITH THIS IMPORTANT CONVERSATION YOU’RE GOING TO TELL ME EVERYTHING

 **Mitsuki** : Is that how all friends treat each other??

 **Boruto** : well, it depends on what kind of friendship you have and how are you as a person

 **Boruto** : for example, Wasabi and Namida are always telling how much they love each other

 **Boruto** : and Chouchou and Inojin are always arguing and calling each other mean names, but they both care for the other, they would never say something that’s really hurtful

 **Boruto** : idk, how were your friends back in the Sound City??

 **Mitsuki** : I never had friends before

 **Boruto** : what??

 **Boruto** : why??

 **Mitsuki** : Well, I never was good at socializing and the other kids always made fun of me for that

 **Mitsuki** : So no one in my school wanted to be friends with me

 **Mitsuki** : I tried though

 **Boruto** : oh

 **Boruto** : well, don’t worry about them, you’re our friend now and you’re amazing!!

 **Boruto** : you’re a little weird but that doesn’t mean we don’t appreciate that from you, and you’re hella smart and really fun to be around

 **Boruto** : And I think-

 **Boruto** : I know everyone thinks that

 **Mitsuki** :

 **Mitsuki** : That’s amazing Boruto, thank you

 **Mitsuki** : I wish I could know more about feelings to express you how i feel right now

 **Mitsuki** : But it feels warm, like the sun

 **Mitsuki** : I think you’re my sun

 **Boruto** : your what now

 **Boruto** : I feel weird yet honored

 **Mitsuki** : :)

* * *

 

  
**[Konoha HS]**

 

 **waste of oxygen** : I’ve only had Mitsuki for a month, but if anything happened to him I would kill everybody in this room and then myself

 **Sarada** : Amen

 **thirsty gurl** : A-women

 **Nara Shikadai** : preach

 **Full Homo** : SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK!!

 **Mitsuki:** :))

* * *

 

  
**Boruidiot > Saradumb**

 

**8:49 PM**

 

 **Boruidiot** : sooooo

 **Boruidiot** : you consider me a brother and you love me

 **Boruidiot** : THATS SO SWEET SARADA I LOVE YOU TOO

 **Saradumb** : GOD NO

 **Boruidiot** : :(

 

**9:37 PM**

 

 **Saradumb** : ….I love you too

 **Boruidiot** : :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked it!! Don't forget to leave a comment!!


	4. Namida Has A Food Kink

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Unbelievable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is this a fic or is it just a place where I put all my headcanons and try to make something out of it??
> 
> I'm not satisfied with this one, sorry if it sucks :/
> 
> Enjoy your reading!!

**AUGUST 23, 6:12 PM**

 

**[Oh Deer]**

 

 **Mama Deer** : get in loser we’re going shopping

 **Baby Deer** : I regret showing you that movie

 **Papa Deer** : just hurry up, you know how your mother gets when we’re late for the 2x1

 **Baby Deer** : omw

* * *

 

**[Konoha HS]**

 

 **Nara Shikadai** : i'm going shopping with my parents

 **Nara Shikadai** : you want me to buy something for the movie night??

 **waste of oxygen** : we’re lacking of snacks and drinks

 **Yuino Iwabee** : Denki Ask If You Could Buy Him Candies

 **Yuino Iwabee** : He Says Hell Pay You Tonight

 **Nara Shikadai** : god

 **Nara Shikadai** : okay I’ll buy it

 **Nara Shikadai** : someone else wants something??

 **Thirsty gurl** : see if you can buy those limited edition chips pls

 **Nara Shikadai** : I already have it in my cart

 **Thirsty gurl** : I love you <3

 **Nara Shikadai** : I’m leaving already, nothing else??

 **Full Homo** : YES BUY POPCORN PLEASE NAMIDA ATE EVERYTHING

 **Suzumeno Namida** : I SAID I’M SORRY

 **Sarada** : we left you for two minutes and you ate all our popcorn

 **Yamanaka Inojin** : I don’t understand how you manage to put that much food that fast inside of your tiny body

 **Kakei Sumire** : it’s her gift

 **Kakei Sumire** : last time we studied together we ordered pizza and she ate like half of it alone

 **Suzumeno Namida** : Stop it!!

 **Full Homo** : Yes!! Stop kinkshaming her!!

 **waste of oxygen** : OMFGASDJKLA

 **Sarada** : Wow.

 **Suzumeno Namida** : ITS NOT A KINK

 **Yuino Iwabee** : Thats What A Person With A Kink Would Say

 **Thirsty gurl** : Namida why did you let me think I was the only thirsty girl here

 **Suzumeno Namida** : IM NOT THIRSTY

 **Suzumeno Namida** : WASABI DEFEND MY HONOR

_Suzumeno Namida was renamed Kinky_

**[Konoha HS was renamed Namida Has A Food Kink]**

**Kinky** : WASABI!!

 **Full Homo** : I mean,,,,

 **Full Homo** : you kinda put a weird face when you eat

 **Thirsty gurl** : yeah

 **Thirsty gurl** : like you’re having way too much fun eating

 **Kaminarimon Denki** : like Metal in PE

 **Kaminarimon Denki** : he enjoys that class too much for it to be just happiness

 **Nara Shikadai** : I leave for five minutes and I come back to discover namida's food Kink

 **Nara Shikadai** : unbelievable.

 **Kinky** : >:(

 **Full Homo** : IM SORRY NAMIDA I LOVE YOU

* * *

 

**[Oh Deer]**

 

 **Baby Deer** : hey I came out of the bathroom and I can’t find our car

 **Baby Deer** : it’s a gas station where did you park

 **Papa Deer** : oh fuck

 **Baby Deer** : what??

 **Baby Deer** : YOU FORGOT ME AT THE GAS STATION???? I???

 **Mama Deer** : WE’RE SORRY

 **Baby Deer** : WHAT THE FUCK

 **Papa Deer** : Your mother is laughing her ass off

 **Baby Deer** : MA

 **Mama Deer** : YOUR FATHER IS LAUGHING TOO

 **Baby Deer** : you two are the worst I can’t believe this

 **Baby Deer** : I’m moving with Uncle Gaara

 **Mama Deer** : We’re sorry little deer

 **Mama Deer** : your father will be doing your chores for the next two weeks, how about that??

 **Papa Deer** : What

 **Papa Deer** : And what about you??

 **Mama Deer** : Shikadai

 **Mama Deer** : You have permission too yell at me if I yell at you

 **Papa Deer** : Oh no

 **Baby Deer** : Oh YES

 **Baby Deer** : Okay, you are forgiven

 **Papa Deer** : I barely can stand you two when you don’t fight

 **Papa Deer** : This is going to be a nightmare, what a drag

* * *

**[Namida Has a Food Kink]**

**Nara Shikadai** : Sorry if i'm a little late

 **Nara Shikadai** : My parents forgot me at a gas station.

 **Thirsty gurl** : WHATAKSKSJSKWKD

 **Yamanaka Inojin** : OMG HAHAHAHA

* * *

 

**[Ino-Shika-Cho (and SaiTemKar)]**

 

 **Ino** : You two suck

 **Cho** : How did you forget him??

 **Kar** : I haven’t laugh this hard since That Time

 **Kar** : I mean, one time it’s a mistake, but two?? You’re trying to get rid of that boy

 **Tem** : We agreed we’d never speak of That Time again Karui

 **Tem** : You made an oath

 **Shika** : We’re very distracted you know, trying to hide the things from Dai

 **Shika** : he’s very observant, I can’t believe he hasn’t noticed yet

 **Cho** : when are you going to tell him?? He’ll be really happy

 **Tem** : We want to wait a little more

 **Tem** : I mean he asked for a sibling when he was five, I don’t think he’ll be that happy now

 **Shika** : Temari thinks he’s going to get jealous

 **Kar** : Oh I think that too

 **Sai** : You forgot him at a gas station, he’s definitely going to get jealous

 **Shika** : shit

 **Tem** : what a drag

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you know that I love Shikatema?? Did I mention that I dream with them having more children??  
> Did you know that the idea of the gas station is, in fact, real?? If you're from Argentina and you use Twitter then you know which one I'm talking about 😂😂
> 
> I promise the next one is going to be longer!! I need more inspiration man
> 
> Leave a comment and kudos if you liked it!!


	5. Family Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PREGANANANT?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof

**[Uchiha Fam]**

**Friday, 16:34 PM**

  
**Little Uchiha** : hey

 **Little Uchiha** : I’m not coming home tonight ill go to Chouchou's

 **Big Uchiha** : your mother asks if you’re coming tomorrow for lunch

 **Little Uchiha** : yeaj

 **Little Uchiha** : yeah

 **Bigger Uchiha** : good

 **Bigger Uchiha** : remember your uncle is coming tomorrow so please don’t make any plans

 **Little Uchiha** : WAIT EHAT UNCLE ITACHI IS COMING??? ASJSKSKKD

 **Big Uchiha** : I’m going to be here too you know.

 **Little Uchiha** : good 4 u buddy

 **Little Uchiha** : when is he coming??

 **Bigger Uchiha** : I think he’s going to be here by lunch

 **Little Uchiha** : YESSSS

 **Little Uchiha** : man I have so many things to tell him

 **Little Uchiha** : oof gotta go, boruto thinks he can beat me at Mario kart

_Little Uchiha went offline._

**Big Uchiha** : I remember when I was loved by my daughter

 **Bigger Uchiha** : God you’re such a drama queen, stop crying and come help me with dinner

_Bigger Uchiha went offline._

**Big Uchiha** :

 **Big Uchiha** : I remember when I was loved by my family

* * *

 

**[Nara-Sabaku no]**

**Saturday, 10:15 AM**

  
**Cool Uncle** : we’re getting there by noon

 **Cool Uncle** : are you coming to get us??

 **Lazy Fuck** : don’t worry temari is going

 **Mini-Shadow** : you’re coming?? Why no one tells me anything??

 **Yodo** : don’t worry, dad literally told us this morning

 **Shy kiddo** : uncle kankuro yelled at us for not having everything prepared and we were so confused

 **Shinki** : they suck

 **Mini-Shadow** : ikr??

 **Boss** : hey, can you all drop the emo teenager crap and at least pretend that you’re happy to see the family

 **Mini-Shadow** : no

 **Shy kiddo** : no

 **Yodo** : no

 **Shinki** : no

 **Boss** : I should’ve gave you up for adoption.

  
**Lazy Fuck** : children, please don’t make your mother/aunt mad

 **Boring** : Listen to your Aunt children.

 **Cool Uncle** : xD

 **Yodo** : STOP MAKING THOSE EMOJIS OH MY GOD

 **Lazy Fuck** : spill the tea sis

 **Mini-Shadow** : ew

 **Boss** : uwu

 **Mini-Shadow** : STOP

 **Boring** :

 **Boring** : yeet.

 **Shinki** : I’m so glad we don’t share the same blood.

* * *

 

**[Sunshine Family]**

**Saturday, 13:27 PM**

  
**Sunshine Dad** : children, if you don’t start cleaning your rooms right now…

 **Sunshine Girl** : …

 **Sunshine Girl** : what’s gonna happen

 **Sunshine Boy** : all your threats are empty you coward smh

 **Sunshine Dad** : THERE WILL BE TROUBLE, FOR BOTH OF YOU

 **Sunshine Boy** : shes laughing at you and calling you weak

 **Sunshine Boy** : honestly same

 **Sunshine Dad** : I’m calling the police.

 **Sunshine Mom** : If those rooms are not clean by the time your Uncle Neji gets here…

 **Sunshine Boy** : I’m: scared

 **Sunshine Girl** : I Don’t Feel Safe.

* * *

 

  
**[Best of the Best]**

**Saturday, 14:04 PM**

  
**Little Flower** : mom

 **Little Flower** : can you please tell dad to stop BOTHERING ME

 **Big Blonde** : Sai, I’m begging you

 **Art** : I did nothing wrong

 **Art** : I’m just trying to inspire him

 **Little Flower** : YOURE POKING ME AND SAYING NAME AGAIN AND AGAIN

 **Little Flower** : MOM

 **Big Blonde** : do I have to go there?? I’m very busy with the shop right now

 **Big Blonde** : and I have to decorate the front of it, and I remember that I asked your father to do it, he told me to not worry

 **Big Blonde** : I didn’t worry and now we have my parents coming tonight to see THAT HORRIBLE THING THAT THEY USED TO CALL THEIR BELOVED FLOWER SHOP

 **Big Blonde** : SO PLEASE, HONEY, GET THE FUCK TO WORK BEFORE I CALL THE LAWYER TO START THE DIVORCE PAPERS

 **Big Blonde** : are we clear??

 **Art** : I’m already painting beautiful, sorry

 **Big Blonde** : inojin.

 **Little Flower** : I’m cleaning my room mommy

 **Big Blonde** : and without me telling you to do it!! I can see you know what’s good for you, nice

* * *

 

  
**[Namida Has a Food Kink]**

** Saturday, 19:51 PM **

**Waste of oxygen** : yo, I’m dying of boredom

 **Shikadai** : same

 **Shikadai** : my family came to visit us and my cousins literally went shopping without me

 **Shikadai** : they left me with all these adults… adulting

 **Inojin** : my parents AND grandparents are drunk God somebody end my suffering

 **Sarada** : I’m having a good time

 **Waste of oxygen** : of course you are

 **Sarada** : my uncle came and he’s the best!! We’ve been talking since he arrived

 **Sarada** : plus my dad is jealous and is really funny

 **Mistuki** : Would you like to come to my house? My brother is out tonight so i'm alone

 **Shikadai** : Mitsuki I love thank you for existing

 **Waste of oxygen** : I ASKED MY PARENTS AND THEY SAID YES

 **Thirsty gurl** : is this invitation extended to the whole group or…?

 **Mitsuki** : all of can come if you like

 **Thirsty gurl** : bless your soul

 **Inojin** : YES I’M GOING I can’t take more drunk jokes

 **Sumire** : I would like to go as well

 **Thirsty** **gurl** : yes, don’t leave me alone with all these idiots

 **Thirsty gurl** : I’m mean boys*

 **Waste of oxygen** : the rest??

 **Sarada** : I pass guys, have a good time tho

 **Kinky** : I’m having a best friend night with Wasabi, so we pass too

 **Denki** : Metal and Iwabee are with me and we’re marathoning Harry Potter, we’ll stay

 **Mitsuki** : I’ll send the location

**23:34 PM**

**Shikadai** : LISTEN

 **Shikadai** : TEAM CAP OR TEAM TONY??

 **Shikadai** : THERE IS A CORRECT ANSWER

 **Inojin** : team cap

 **Shikadai** : you shut your fuck

 **Sarada** : the hell Inojin?? Team Tony all the way

 **Kinky** : team cap

 **Wasabi** : IRON MAN

 **Waste of oxygen** : I like both but if I have to choose I’ll choose cap

 **Sarada** : I thought it was impossible to feel more disgusted about you

 **Sarada** : guess I was fucking wrong

 **Denki** : both

 **Iwabee** : Neither

 **Metal Lee** : black widow

 **Shikadai** : we all are team black widow

 **Shikadai** : you’re committing crime if you don’t love her, period

 **Thirsty gurl** : iron Man is the best man, what’s wrong with y’all

 **Shikadai** : what I see is that half of the group is actually smart and the other half got dropped when they were babies multiple times

 **Inojin** : why are you so dramatic

 **Shikadai** : why did you break my heart

 **Sarada** : were did all of this come from??

 **Mitsuki** : we’re marathoning marvel movies, and inojin told me that the best team is team cap

 **Mitsuki** : and Shikadai got really mad and said that the best team is team Tony

 **Mitsuki** : and then they started arguing and the rest of us just kept watching the movie

 **Mitsuki** : honestly I just like Thor and Peter

 **Waste of oxygen** : who doesn’t likes Thor man

 **Thirsty gurl** : same

 **Shikadai** : calm down you horny bitches, let’s keep watching, we didn’t get to the part when we see why CAPTAIN AMERICA SUCKS

 **Inojin** : HE DID IT FOR LOVE

* * *

 

  
**[Oh deer!]**

** Saturday, 23:39 PM **

**Mama Deer** : so

 **Papa Deer** : so

 **Baby Deer** : what

 **Baby Deer** : what’s happening

 **Papa Deer** : your mother and I have something to tell you

 **Baby Deer** : I’m scared

 **Mama Deer** : we wanted to tell you in person, but we told your cousins and we don’t want you to hear it from other people

 **Baby Deer** : what is it??

 **Baby Deer** : are you ill? Is it terminal?? OH MY GOD TELL YOU’RE NOT GOING TO DIE

 **Mama Deer** : No no!! Is not that baby, don’t worry

 **Baby Deer** : I almost had meltdown

 **Baby Deer** : what is it then??

 **Papa Deer** : let’s say quickly

 **Papa Deer** : your mother

 **Papa Deer** : is pragernante

 **Baby Deer** : Excuse me

 **Baby Deer** : What.

 **Mama Deer** : I’m prognent

 **Papa Deer** : porgnant

 **Mama Deer** : pegnarte

 **Papa Deer** : pregegnant

 **Baby Deer** : Ha Ha Ha Qué Funny

 **Baby Deer** : You Are Not

_Baby Deer was renamed Big Bro Deer!_

**Big Bro Deer** : ay por el amor de Dios.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... It's been a long time, sorry!!!  
> I got robbed when I was coming home from school about a month ago, don't worry, I'm completely, he just took my phone with MY DAMN CHAPTER ON IT, man I was so mad, after that I went a few weeks without phone, and I don't have a computer so I couldn't write the fic, and when o got my new phone I kinda forgot about the fic, AGAIN I'M SO SORRY, I PROMISE I'LL MAKE UP FOR IT
> 
> I'm sorry for the shitty chapter too, o realized that I had to write so I did it kinda fast
> 
> Another thing, I had a dream where Temari was from my country and we were friends and it was amazing so I'm making Temari Latina, I hope none of you mind!!
> 
> Also HAPPY PRIDE MONTH Y'ALL!! ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜 I'm planning on doing a series of one shot with LGBTQ+ themes
> 
> You thought I was going to left out Itachi and Neji?? 
> 
> Are you Team Cap or Team Iron Man?? There Is A Correct Answer.
> 
> You can go and yell at me for being so late at my Tumblr if you like!! Is i-wanna-slow-dance-with-you


	6. OWO WHAT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shikadai disappears for like two seconds and everyone loses their minds

**[Namida Has a Food Kink]**

**Monday, 3:06 AM**

**Shikadai** : the moon landing was fake

**Shikadai** : alien are real and they live among us

**Shikadai** : the multiverse is real

**Sarada** : yeah

**Sarada** : so

**Sarada** : is there a reason why are you sharing your theories??

**Sarada** : AT THREE AM

**Sarada** : ON MONDAY

**Shikadai** : no

**Shikadai** : mothman is real

**Waste** **of** **oxygen** : that one is real I fought him behind a Denny’s

**Sarada** : shut the fuck up and go to sleep

**Inojin** : I believe in the multiverse one

**Sarada** : oh God

**Mitsuki** : the other night I dreamed that we were some kind of ninja

**Mitsuki** : and boruto's father was like the president and he was really powerful and I was a clone

**Mitsuki** : and everyone parents were really powerful too but my parent was a criminal of some kind and they weren’t allowed into the village but the president let me go there to school

**Sarada** : i-

**Sarada** : why does that sounds so familiar

**Thirsty girl** : did you felt that too?? Like that dream is a really distant memory

**Waste of oxygen** : idk why but I feel like I was a real brat in that memory

**Sarada** : nono that is real you are a brat

**Waste of oxygen** : I hate you

**Shikadai** : would I make a good big brother??

**Shikadai** : discuss

**Waste of oxygen** : ya you would be, you helped a lot with Hima when we were little

**Inojin** : why the sudden question??

**Shikadai** : yes so my mom is pregnant

**Inojin** : WHAT

**Thirsty girl** : OMG FOR REAL????

**Shikadai** : yeah

**Shikadai** : they told me a few days ago

**Waste of oxygen** : OMG CONGRATULATIONS

**Sarada** : I wish I had a little sibling :( congratulations!!

**Inojin** : Everything makes so much sense right now

**Thirsty girl** : same

**Shikadai** : ??

**Thirsty girl** : I think our parents knew

**Thirsty girl** : bc they kept talking about a baby shower and all that stuff and when I asked they got really nervous

**Inojin** : same here

**Inojin** : my dad’s been painting baby related stuff and my mom bought some baby stuff

**Shikadai** : yeah

**Shikadai** : I’m starting to think that I’m very stupid

**Shikadai** : there’s a ton of baby stuff on my house and I didn’t even notice!!

**Shikadai** : but whatever i guess

* * *

 

**Monday, 9:34 AM**

**Sumire** : Oh I’m so happy for you Shikadai!!

**Sumire** : I’m sure you will be an excellent big brother

**Kinky** : I LOVE BABIES

**Wasabi** : congrats bro!!

**Shikadai** : thank you guys

**Shikadai** : I’m preventing my parents from giving my poor baby sibling an ugly name

**Shikadai** : my dad went all excited and said “MINERVA!!”

**Shikadai** : that’s the ugliest name I’ve heard

**Shikadai** : plus it doesn’t go with the tradition

**Inojin** : yeah

**Inojin** : but I guess it doesn’t count this time since we already have the names

**Inojin** : and our parents aren’t pregnant

**Denki** : tradition…?

**Thirsty girl** : our families tradition

**Thirsty girl** : the Ino-Shika-Cho

**Kinky** : i

**Wasabi** : the fuck guys

**Inojin** : for some reason our parents get babies at more or less the same time

**Inojin** : and the names of the babies have to have de ino, shika or cho respectively

**Inojin** : like my grandad is Inoichi, my mom’s just Ino, and mine is Inojin

**Thirsty girl** : Choza, Chouji and Chouchou in my case

**Shikadai** : Shikaku, Shikamaru and Shikadai

**Sarada** : I don’t mean to be rude

**Sarada** : but that’s fucking weird

**Waste of oxygen** : yeah, and like, did your parents agreed with a time to conceive or…?

**Wasabi** : YEAH THAT

**Wasabi** : HOW AWKWARD MAN

**Wasabi** : imagine trying to explain that to your spouse

**Wasabi** : “yeah we have to get pregnant bc my best friend got pregnant and I don’t want to break the tradition”

**Shikadai** : yes they agreed to get pregnant at the same time, they scheduled it and everything

**Sarada** : wow

**Wasabi** : and y’all have to continue the tradition??

**Inojin** : I mean

**Thirsty girl** : we’re supposed to

**Thirsty girl:** but I think it’s our job to break stupid traditions

**Shikadai** : yeah, I mean, I wouldn’t be opposed to name my child with a shika, but the whole organizing the time of conception?? Ya no forget about it

**Inojin** : same

**Waste of oxygen** : THATS IT

**Waste of oxygen** : DON’T LET THEM RULE YOUR LIFE GODDAMNIT

**Sarada** : jfc is this about the ramen thing

**Shikadai** : istg boruto I thought you’d grow out of it

**Sarada** : bold of you to assume that he’ll grow

**Shikadai** : you got me there

**Waste of oxygen** : fuck you >:(

* * *

 

**[Beauty team]**

**Tuesday, 6:20 AM**

**Chubby Beauty** : yo I’m making cinnamon rolls, want me to take some to school today??

**Lazy beauty** : hell yeah

**Pale Beauty** : yell heah

**Lazy Beauty** : if you keep that up I will destroy your stupid captain America collection

**Pale Beauty** : I will never stop bitch

* * *

 

**[Namida has a food kink]**

**10:48 AM**

**Thirsty girl** : hey has someone seen Shikadai???

**Thirsty girl** : i brought cinnamon rolls and usually he’s the first to get one

**Sarada** : the math’s teacher is sick and we have free period, he left like half an hour ago

**Inojin** : ???

**Inojin** : I already checked all his nap spots

**Waste of oxygen** : did you check the janitors closet??

**Inojin** : that’s the first place I checked

**Sarada** : weird…

* * *

 

**Boruto >>> Shikadai **

**10:50 AM**

**Bo** : hey

**Bo** : where are you??

**Bo** : dude you’re going to miss the cinnamon rolls

**11:03**

**Bo** : at least you could leave on read so I know that YOURE ALIVE WHERE ARE YOU

**Bo** : THE TEACHERS ARE LOOKING FOR YOU AND IM THIS )( CLOSE TO CALL THE POLICE

**11:24**

**Bo** : I’m cryinnde wherr r u

**11:39**

**Dai** : Jesus fucking Christ

**Bo** : YOURE ALIVE

**Bo** : THANK BEYONCE

**Bo** : WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU

**Dai** : IM ON THE ROOFTOP YOU IDIOT

**Dai** : IM PLAYING SHÔGI

**Bo** : i-

* * *

 

**[Namida Has a Kink Food was renamed We Should Kill Shikadai]**

**11:56 AM**

**Thirsty girl** : I’m going to kill you

**Shikadai** : um

**Inojin** : next time answer our texts bitch

**Sarada** : the principal went crazy

**Sarada** : they almost called your parents

**Mitsuki** : i’m pretty sure Boruto started crying

**Waste of oxygen** : WELL I THOUGHT SOMETHING BAD HAPPENED TO HIM

**Waste of oxygen** : HE ALWAYS ANSWER MY TEXTS

**Shikadai** : sorry dude

**Shikadai** : I got caught up in the game

**Thirsty girl** : only you could ignore your phone to play a dumb board game ALONE

**Shikadai** : I wasn’t alone

**Waste of oxygen** : OWO WHAT

**Thirsty girl:** are you saying…

**Inojin** : that you made a friend??

**Thirsty gir** l: all on your own??

**Waste of oxygen** : IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU

**Shikadai** : I wouldn’t call them a friend

**Shikadai** : more like an acquaintance

**Shikadai** : I had a headache and I went to the rooftop to have some calm and fresh air and play shôgi a little

**Shikadai** : and he was there and he saw my board and long story short: he’s like really good at it

**Shikadai** : so I had to think really hard my movements and I turned my phone off

**Thirsty girl** : I thought it was a girl

**Thirsty girl** : I’m doomed to never have a sister-in-law

**Shikadai** : haha I suppose

* * *

 

**Boruto >>>Shikadai **

**Bo** : what was that “haha I suppose” bullshit

**Dai** : ???

**Dai** : it means… that I suppose??

**Bo** : you never say haha

**Bo** : No one says haha anymore

**Dai** : well I do

**Bo** : somethings wrong with you

**Dai** : no????

**Bo** : and I’m going to find out what is it

**Dai** : there’s literally nothing wrong bitch

**Dai** : you just like drama

**Bo** : yeah yeah

**Bo** : we’ll see

**Dai** : now I know what sarada means everytime she says she wants to destroy your very existence.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo, sorry? xd I don't have an excuse please don't kill me, but if you want you can go and leave a well-deserved hate comment on my Tumblr!! i-wanna-slow-dance-with-you  
> I also have a Twitter but is mainly in Spanish :( tho if you want to follow me I wouldn't be mad!! It's ScarrletSunrise ;D  
> I hope it was funny?? I think this one is very boring, but I HAD to update  
> So if you see a mistake PLEASE TELL ME I WOULD BE VERY GRATEFUL

**Author's Note:**

> Don't forget to leave a comment if you liked it!!


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